Wednesday, October 05, 2016

Complete. Yet, incomplete.

I couldn't sleep that night and I went into the balcony attached to the kitchen. That was my mom's favorite place. She used to sit there whenever she was not feeling well or she needed some lonely time. She used to tell, "I feel like this place has some magic in here. It feels good whenever I come here and look at the view".


I was on my way back to bed.

"Yes, I'm sure, Disha and Ranu will understand" he blabbered, with his head down and a glass of rum in his hand and a cigarette in the other. 

"Samir, we have been seeing each other for a long time now. Why don't you tell them about us? Disha is a kid, I know, but I'm sure Ranu will understand" shouted Sanjana at my dad and opened the window to set free the smoke from the cancer causing stick of tobacco.

I've witnessed all this while the door was open enough for me to peek in. Disha doesn't understand, I don't know and dad doesn't tell us, what's going on. I've waited for another minute with tears rolling down my cheek and then mapped my way back to bed. I went into my room and kissed Disha, my little sister, a good night.

Sanjana used to come once or twice a week but in no time, she moved to our place.

We were all dining that night and "How's the food, Ranu?" asked Sanjana. I could do nothing but to nod in acceptance before dad started speaking. "Sweethearts, please listen to me carefully. I know you might have a lot of questions and I'm gonna answer each one of them" he said, by smoothly holding my hand.

"I thought and I hope this will be okay with and for, both of you and I hope you will be as happy as I am with this decision. So, here it is. Sanjana and I love each other and she is going to be your mother, I mean your stepmother and she's going to do her best to make you happy and make sure that you never feel the emptiness of not having a mom in your life." he continued.

I did not understand or know what to say. I  kept listening to dad, nodded my head agreeing to every question he's asked.

Soon Disha and I went to our rooms and it's been official - Sanjana was going to stay with us.

Sanjana soon became one of us and Disha was the happiest. In no time, I also got used to the fact of Sanjana being addressed as 'Mom' by Disha. I was happy that Disha was happy.

Everything went back to being normal since then. 

I was in our room working on my assignment and Disha asked, "Can you please come and talk to mom? She seems to be crying." By the time I went to their bedroom she wasn't there. I went into the kitchen, got Disha her milk and got back.

The next day, by the time I was back home, I saw Sanjana helping Disha with her homework and I was happy about it.  Later that night, Disha came to me and said again, "Ranu, can you please check in mom. She's been crying again". I went to see what's wrong and I was not able to find her that night either. I asked Disha this time, "Where's mom?". "She's in the kitchen", said Disha.

I went there and saw no one. I was curious this time. I kept an eye on Disha the next day and waited for her to come to me again with Sanjana's crying news. This time she came again with the exact same words, "Ranu, can you please talk to mom, She has been crying again in the kitchen".

I couldn't dare to go there this time. The last place she's spent time before she came to me with the complaint was the Kitchen balcony, my mom's favorite place and there was no one except her.

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